31 October 2007

Treeecks or Treeeats

Okay, so I'm a sucker for Halloween. I spent the better part of the afternoon reading "real" ghost stories, and the early evening scanning for scary movies. I gotta tell ya - TV has really let me down this year. What a bunch of lame-ass movies, like "Fright Night" and "Urban Legend." Hell, my grandmother's facial hair is scarier.

Anyhoo, I hate to be the guy that runs out of candy and has to hand out cough drops and Advil, then turn out the light. So I bought about $40 worth of really good stuff. That way, if the little beggars don't show up and claim it, I have something to feed the candy monster (that's me) for a few days at work.

Sunset is at 7:10pm. As of 7:30, I got nothin'. Nobody. Not one trick-or-treater. I figure this is a win-win for me - I don't have to get up, and I get to score 40 bucks worth of sweetness.

Alas, I had celebrated too early.

I love giving candy to kids (save the smart-ass remarks), but this year...well, it's different. It seems that the newest members of our great American society have fully embraced our cultural traditions, including the annual consumption of candy in the name of Satan. Oh, sure - the rest of the year they'd just as soon use nerve agent on us, but tonight - they want my candy. And they're not at ALL ashamed to dress up in traditional dress and beg for our infidel treats.

"TREEEECKS OR TREEEAATS" is the cry. Brown kids. Lots of 'em. Caramba. Hell, at least they're having fun, and they're polite, and they really seem to appreciate it.

Crap. Looks like it's time to break out the cough drops...

Late update: the white, teenaged Minnie Mouse got some extra candy. Red high-heels. Hubba-hubba.
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