12 June 2004

Rush Limbaugh announces end of his third marriage

Someone once told me, "after the second divorce, it might be you."

'Gas station incident a mistake'

Okay. I lost the last bet for $10. Nonetheless, I bet $100 that alcohol had something to do with this one...


I take back almost every bad thing I have ever said about California, just because of this.

New York City: Reagan should be on a $3 bill

one word - ass hole. or is that two?

It's so funny to see the liberal whiners in this country go on and on and on and on for weeks on end over something meaningless and stupid, but to bitch about a state funeral of one of the greatest American presidents going on for "too long" is just insanity at its greatest. Did you see whining about the coverage of Princess Di? Did you see whining about the endless coverage of TWA flight 800? Did you see whining about the endless coverage of the Abu Ghrab prison scandal? All of which ran out of things to say in a few days.

It has never been more clear who the looters are in our society.

I Want Gmail

Anyone who has a spare invite to Google Mail, could you hook a brother up?

The Weather in North Texas

How many bottle caps do you have to collect in order to get a meteorology degree? Evidently, being right about your "forecast" isn't a prerequisite for the job. Rained like crazy this morning. But there's no rain until Sunday, according to the weather persons.

I need a job where I get paid lots of money, get to be on TV, and never have to be right. That'd be cool.

11 June 2004

McCain Rejects Kerry's VP Overture

Pity. McCain can do far more damage as a so-called Republican. If he'd just run for VP, it would make things so much simpler. McCain is already a pawn of the Democratic party. He's just too stupid to realize it.

Let me get this straight...

Terry Nichols is convicted of the death of 161 people, but the jury can't decide whether or not he deserves the death penalty? 161 people. And he's guilty. So...what decision needs to be made?


clintons napping

slimeballs. you'd think at the least they would show some respect at Reagan's funeral. oh, wait, it's the clintons. what was I thinking?

John Bergstrom's Attack Cartoons

I like this guy's cartoons. If you're a regular reader of the Tattler, chances are you will, too.

Ananova - F*cking villagers vote against name change

I don't make these up, folks. It's on the Internet, so it must be true!

F*cking Villagers. That's funny.

Irony Defined

Dog meat used in hot dogs. Sparky? Sparky? Where are ya, boy?

Wonder as 1,000-year-old padded bra dug up

Wonder, indeed. I wonder what size it is???

More Fun With Names

Sorry. Really bad pun with that title...

Al-Qaida confirms attack on 'unbelievers'

How brave they are against unarmed victims.

Brigitte Bardot fined for inciting racial hatred

so, now you get fined for writing what you think in books?? That is, if you don't agree with the prevailing opinion??

Today's Sasquatch Sighting Courtesy of the Yukon

And I quote: "Just because you can't prove something was there, does not mean it was not there."

So true.

Never Argue on an Overpass

Man Throws Woman Off Overpass. I guess in addition to those "No Fishing From Bridge" signs, we're gonna need some new ones.

10 bucks says they ain't from around here...

10 June 2004

Famous Last Words

"Wanna see a real hand grenade?"

Crazy People and the World Wide Interweb Thingy

I guess crazy people have been around for as long as there have been "normal" people, but it wasn't until the advent of the Internet that I've had to put up with them. I mean, how often do you actually physically meet a bonafide loony, really? However, a casual stroll through the web will avail you of all sorts of conspiracy theorists, wannabe superstars, and just plain old-fashioned whackos who now have a medium through which they can share their lunacy with the rest of humankind.

What's that you say? You don't know what I'm talking about? Be deprived no longer. Look, linger over their particular brand of whackiness, and don't forget to buy their products!

John Titor - okay, technically not a nut, per se, but proof that people will build websites about anything.

Armageddon Online. Can't tell yer megatsunamis from your pandemics without this site!

Swami Sananda - one of my all-time fave loonies. An aggravating website resplendent with unwanted music, horrible graphics, and lots and lots of pics of Swami Bananarama. He's the coo-cookiest, man.

My Bodyweight. That's the name of the title page. Seriously. This person is one reason that I carry a gun. He is so very seriously insane that it boggles the sane part of my mind (what's left of it after looking at this site). This dude can't keep a job because someone is manipulating the timeline to change history, mess with his ability to stay married,
change the climate, and generally commit shenannigans. Of course, this guy is the ONLY person who's on to this scheme. Thank goodness his sane and sober exegesis of this vast conspiracy can be perused via the wonderful WWW. Don't forget: the shiny side of the foil goes out.

The Reptilians. Who are they really? Who really cares? This crazy person does.

Crystalinks. Ellie Crystal's a psychic! Neato! She got abducted by aliens! Sweet! She's from Brooklyn! ick.

Infowars.com - Alex Jones hates everything, apparently. Especially the government. Conspiracy! Conspiracy!

Jeff Rense must have the same water supply as Alex Jones. Mercy. If the volume of crap you put out equals truth, Jeff is the man!

I've noticed a disturbing trend with most of these sites. They have dozens of pages, and each page is about a mile long. It's called "hyperlinking," people. Use it.

This is making me tired, and that means the rays are taking control of my mind. Must...get...rest...sleep...consume...reproduce....zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

The Kentucky Governor Will Buy His Own Drinks This Week...

Fletcher's plane stirs a panic; Capitol, high court evacuated.

I watched the news footage of the Capitol evacuation on TV this morning. The transponder on his airplane "began to malfunction," which basically made his plane an unidentified (and unauthorized!) aircraft.

Evacuate the Capitol, scramble 2 Eagles, send up Blackhawks for escorts to (ironically) Reagan National Airport.

Welcome to our post-9/11 world.

Structured Procrastination

Bookmark this page, then read it when you get around to it.

Cop was killed for his gun, authorities say

Yikes. This nut musta watched Rambo too many times.

British Athletes

Caramba. Put the beer down and run around the block a few times.

1/2 of town's cops are polygamists

having more than 1 mother in law should be punishment enough.

So Now They Think He Was Charming

go ann, go!

My favorite all time Reagan quote:

"My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."


brittney injures knee

gotta watch those pesky knees

09 June 2004

Ted Rall is an Idiot

I know it's restating the obvious, but what an insensitive, uncaring, downright hateful man.

Quoth this humanitarian:
"Still, I'm not a knee-jerk left-wing guy," Mr. Rall said. "I am an advocate of the Second Amendment; I don't believe in abortion as birth control; and I was the first to call for Clinton's impeachment. I think that this country has shifted so far over to the right that anyone who is a garden-variety Democrat circa 1972 is painted as a Marxist-Leninist."

But it's okay to say Pat Tillman was a idiot for dying for his country, and that Ronald Reagan is burning in hell (which Rall apparently doesn't believe in).

Mr. Rall defended the "crispy brown" comment and said it was made "to get people to understand that the right is attempting to canonize this guy, and it is ridiculous. If there is a hell, this guy is in it."

Send us a postcard from hell, Ted.

Dial 1-800-psycho today!

Ignore the warning signs, and you just might end up on the next episode of The FBI Files...

Kerry flip-flops on terrorism

John Kerry flip flops?? I find that so hard to believe. Really.

PITTSBURG / Aspiring rapper arrested in killing of his promoter

Your music sucks, so you shoot your promoter? Smart.

Rachel Hunter slams Clinton

I knew I had the hots for her when I was a kid for a reason!

WorldNetDaily: Giuliani to replace Cheney on ticket?

Personally, I think this would be a smart move. But, who am I to judge!!

Miami Passenger Accused of Slapping Air Marshal

It's rude to hang up on someone, but okay to slap a Federal Air Marshall? Miss Manners is not impressed, dear air traveller...

Passion's Flames, Part II

What is up with couples setting each other aflame? Just for the record, the women haven't fared too well in this category. Guys 2, Girls 0.

08 June 2004

U.S. Forces Free Hostages in Baghdad Raid

Okay. See that headline? "U.S. Forces Free Hostages..."

Now, look how the BBC reports that same rescue:
Special forces free Iraq hostages

The word "American" is not used in context with the rescue. Not once. Our allies, the British. Thanks, BBC, for fair and balanced reporting.

Venezuelan Recall Vote Set for Aug. 15

I hear Caracas is nice this time of year...

Java Lava

A hot time for tourists at 2 Indonesian volcanoes. 2 tourists caught some football-sized rocks. They lost the toss...

Dallas, Texas Regional Loop by Intellicast

this weather sucks.
just thought I'd point that out.

Dave's Daily - Bizarre News - Top Doc Backs Picking Your Nose And Eating It

Gag me with a booger. Eeewwww.

When Chalupas are Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Have Chalupas

Stop the insanity. Think about the children.

Bad Apples

Scroll down to "Bad Apples." This is what the Democratic Party has become: petulant and unpatriotic.

07 June 2004

Jesse Jackson Tells Liberals 'Right Wing Is Not That Popular' -- 06/07/2004

And here I thought the rev was dead. Hmph.

Perhaps he should check the latest information that shows the Republican Party pulls in more donors that donate the minimum ammounts while the Democrat Party pulls in less donors, but that donate the maximum ammount.

You gotta just love the libbys, why let the truth ruin a good speech?

Western Airliners May Be al-Qaida Target

The terrorists are such brave lads. I imagine they're finding out the hard way in Iraq (and elsewhere) that Americans with guns know how to shoot and are willing to do so.
Back to picking on people who don't fight back. How brave.

Ex-'Baywatch' Star Hasselhoff Arrested

I want to get drunk every time I hear this guy sing. I couldn't imagine having to be myself and listen to that all the time and stay sober...

Satellite images 'show Atlantis'

how cool would this be if true?


Tin Foil Prank!

That'll teach you to go on vacation...