Today while I was riding the elliptical at the gym I caught the breathless CNN talking heads prattling on like the idiots that they are. Al-Zawahri speaks!! They can't believe the bravery, the strong words, the rhetoric from the man so recently targeted by the CIA. They fear what this man and his brethren are capable of! What a display of power - only 2 weeks after narrowly escaping death he sends out a video!! Yes, our pals on CNN - gotta love em.
I almost threw up. And not from exertion.
Let's be realistic here.
Two weeks after the CIA told us they didn't get this pig eater, he speaks via a video tape smuggled to the mouthpiece of the terrorists, al-jazeera. Now for some reason, CNN reports the news from al-jazeera as if it's more accurate than the news from our government....
You'll note that it is being reported as a video tape, not a DVD, not a digital recording. A tape. If alqaida was so powerful, you'd think they have the ability to digitally record something and then instantly publish it on the internets. You know, like I'm doing right now.
Now, I'm not a CIA/NSA analyst. But the way I see it, to actually publish something to the internets yourself you need 3 things. Power, a computer, and a connection. By smuggling a video tape to al-jazeera this tells me that the cowards are missing either power, a computer, or more likely, a connection. Last time I checked, caves don't come standard with dial-up or DSL.
Or, could it be that the cowards know the instant they hook up to the internets they're signing their own death warrant? Nah, couldn't be that, they're so brave.
Now, as to the bulk of the message, how comical. Al-Zawahari calls Bush the "butcher of Washington" for killing 18 terrorist sympathizers. What's that make his fearless leader (you know, the guy who's too chicken shit to poke his head out of the cave he's hiding in), Osama? As in, the coward who killed 3,000 people on 9/11? Does that make him a butcher too, or is that different?
Another item of amusement is that Al-Zawahari (as do other of his cowardly brethren) calls us "crusaders". Here's a news flash, dickhead: the Crusades took place more or less from 1096 to 1270. That's almost 750 years ago. And I thought my ex-wife held a grudge.
And, in spite of your repeated demands of a truce, I'm sorry to say that you're still a hunted rat. And you're going to continue to be a hunted rat until you are dead. How ya sleepin' in that cave, pal?
Now, in the past, alqaida was well known for their simultaneous attacks on innocent people. Now it would appear that they're well known for their nearly (only 2 weeks apart!!) simultaneous communiques. CNN was sure impressed!
I'm also well aware that in the past, such communications from the rats would often lead to an attack on the West - usually on innocent people on their way to work or on vacation. Will that happen now? Only time will tell.
However, I can't help but be reminded of the oldish arcade game where you stood over the tabletop where the beaver/rat/squirrel/whatever it was poked it's head out into varying holes and it was your job to pound the snot out of the rat with the mallet. For some strange reason, it strikes me that Al-Zawahari and his cowardly friends are the rats, and we're holding the mallet. But that's just me.
As a final note, is it just me, or does Al-Zawahari look a lot like Mikhail Gorbachov with a turban and beard?
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