Range Report

Shot at Wichita Falls today. Damn cold at the start, and very, very windy. 5 fun run and gun stages and the classifier. Dan, the Pimp and I made the trek to the range, leaving at oh dark thirty, grabbing something to eat and getting to the range by about 9:45.

Stage 1 - start kneeling, "praying for a good run", get to your gun, shoot four targets through the port, then haul ass to engage two more arrays of 4 around the corner. A few of us got to reshoot this stage - what we thought were ports turned out to not be so. No biggie - more shooting is good shooting. Here's some pics of Dan and I:

Stage 2 had us starting in a box of our choice (on either the left or right side of the stage) and engage 3 paper, one popper, and then a mirror image (almost) on the opposite side. Advance into a narrowing hallway, and engage 1 paper in the middle of the bay, 1 paper on either side of the bay, and a popper next to the outside paper targets.

Stage 3 was a longish hallway type stage. Start with hands on the table, engage 4 poppers about 15m downrange, and one paper target. Advance down the hallway and two ports on the left with two paper each, then a quick step to the right with 3 paper, then about 5m down the hallway there were 4 more paper, and at the end of the hallway a paper covered partially with a no shoot and then "around" the corner a low paper target. Here's the Pimp and I at work on this stage:

Stage 4 seemed to have some bad karma. Start with your unloaded gun on the table with mag next to it. Engage 3 paper through the port, then 4 small pieces of steel in between the starting port and the door we had to run to about 10m away. Open the door, engage 3 paper targets IN the doorway, and then haul ass to the final position to engage 4 paper targets 10-12m away through a window. My camera crapped out of batteries so no more pics.... I got ultra lucky here. I wasn't paying attention to the COF and didn't hear the part about not engaging the steel through the first port. And did. At the last shooting position, my pistol decided to crap out on me (thanks to very cold conditions, very windy conditions blowing the ultra fine dust EVERYWHERE, and my pistol not being quite broken in yet after the hard chrome job...) But anyway - I earned two procedurals and the mother of all jams which cost me 20 seconds. How do I know it cost me 20 seconds you ask??? Well, that's because it turns out most of our squad, myself included, started in the wrong spot and had to reshoot! C'est la vie!

Stage 5 was a repeat of a stage last month, with a slight twist at the end. 4 big ports in a row, made of barrels. Behind each port at about 1m were arrays of 4 shoot targets with a no shoot covering 2 of them. At the end of the wall, you then got to engage a Texas Star. Fun, down and dirty stage.

Stage 6 was the classifier. 3 targets, two strings. String 1 at 15m had you shoot the 3 targets, reload then re-engage with strong hand only. String 2 at 10m had you shoot the 3 targets, reload, then re-engage with weak hand only. Gun issues for me again on the strong hand part; I think I was limp wristing with a combination of just general gun grunge. Got all my hits though, and even though the first string cost me about 10 seconds more than it should have, I still finished 5th on the stage thanks to good hits and reloads.

Wound up 3rd overall, not too shabby, Dan finished 10th with his new limited setup, and the Pimp finished well in open - having a lot of dirty gun issues himself.

The elements were pretty tough - the wind was brutal and I still haven't removed all the dust from my mouth and ears. Very very cold this morning, but hey, any day at the range is better than a day NOT at the range!

Brewer angers church with Jesus image

A Lithuanian brewer has angered the Catholic Church by using an image of Jesus wearing headphones to advertise beer.

Let the riots begin!

Police hunt late night nudists

Police in Berane say the men were fully naked and appear to emerge only at night - usually in pairs. Local media speculated the men could be walking naked either after losing a drunken bet or for health reasons.

Health reasons? Give me a freakin' break. I see two naked fags walking down the street, I'm betting it's not for health reasons. This doesn't fly here in Texas.

Man pulls car with ears while standing on eggs

His performance drew a big crowd of astonished onlookers.

I wonder what hurt worse, his ears or his eggs?

CALVIN AND HOBBES — AND MUHAMMAD

Ann Coulter weighs in on the Muslim outrage over the cartoons of Muhammad.

Muslims are the only people who make feminists seem laid-back. The little darlings brandish placards with typical Religion of Peace slogans, such as: Behead Those Who Insult Islam," "Europe, you will pay, extermination is on the way" and "Butcher those who mock Islam." They warn Europe of their own impending 9/11 with signs that say: "Europe: Your 9/11 will come" — which is ironic, because they almost had me convinced the Jews were behind the 9/11 attack.

But Muslims think they can issue decrees about what images can appear in newspaper cartoons. Who do they think they are, liberals?

The Trixinator Has Arrived

After 6 long months of waiting, it's finally here. I know, I know - it looks very similar to BradC's - but I'm posting pics just the same. Who doesn't need more gun porn anyway?? This has been a glorious week - new hairdo (thanks Tina!), a new pair of shoes, I leave for a week of diving on an island paradise on Sat, AND I got my new gun. Excuse me, I need a moment or two alone....




And no, you can't borrow it - yet, anyway... :-)

Brokeback to the Future

HI-larious.

British court jails radical Muslim cleric

Yarrrgh! Ye best be guarding yer booty, matey! Seven years be a long time.

'Banned' Aphrodisiac Soda To Be Sold In Stores

The soda was banned in France and Denmark, but makers insist it is safe and works as an aphrodisiac. A warning label on the can claims, "This beverage will arouse you."

Dr. Pecker, anyone?

Historical Images of Mohammed

Interesting. Just when we've all been told ad nauseum that the whole reason muslims are rioting across the world is because it's a mortal sin to depict Mohammed in any images.

Yet here you can find historical images of Mohammed going back several hundred years, up to and including the cartoons causing the current state of war and rioting.

Another interesting tidbit that's making its way across the blogosphere is that perhaps there are some imams to blame for the entire thing:

"Furthermore, when a delegation of Danish imams went to the Middle East to discuss the issue of the cartoons with senior officials and prominent Islamic scholars, the imams openly distributed a booklet that showed not only the original 12 cartoons, but three fraudulent anti-Mohammed depictions that were much more offensive than the ones published in Denmark. It is now thought that these three bonus images are what ignited the outrage in the Muslim world. The newspaper Ekstra Bladet obtained a copy of the booklet and presented the three offensive images on its Web site (though not in an easy-to-find place). All look like low-quality photocopies. "

Now, wouldn't that be interesting if these riots have been staged from the very beginning.

I think it's fairly well known that these cartoons were first published last year in September. Why the riots now? Almost makes you wonder if there's something going on that no one is paying attention to.... But that's just me being paranoid.

We are all Danes now

I think this article sums it up quite nicely.

Hindus may consider it odious to use cows as food, but they do not resort to boycotts, threats, and violence when non-Hindus eat hamburger or steak. They do not demand that everyone abide by the strictures of Hinduism and avoid words and deeds that Hindus might find upsetting. The same is true of Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Mormons: They don't lash out in violence when their religious sensibilities are offended. They certainly don't expect their beliefs to be immune from criticism, mockery, or dissent.
But radical Muslims do.

Here's what Muslims seem to lack: a sense of humor.

That anything so mild could trigger a reaction so crazed -- riots, death threats, kidnappings, flag-burnings -- speaks volumes about the chasm that separates the values of the civilized world from those in too much of the Islamic world. Freedom of the press, the marketplace of ideas, the right to skewer sacred cows: Militant Islam knows none of this. And if the jihadis get their way, it will be swept aside everywhere by the censorship and intolerance of sharia.

Honestly, do you folks have to take everything so completely seriously?

Honestly, the hardest thing for me right now is realizing that I agree with an editorial published in the Boston Globe.

You people need to relax. What, I'm over-reacting? Like they say, one picture...



Heck, I'm on a roll here - let's make it two:


Wake up. Welcome to the 21st Century.

Robo Urinal: Behold Your Porcelain Master

Just one more before I head out for the day.

Hehe. Head.

the odk - o c t o p u s d r o p k i c k !

My new favorite music video. "Night of Fire." Engrish videos rule.

Anybody know who the Nissei WWF dude is?

Think I'll cut my wrists now.

Feminist pioneer Betty Friedan dies

The people at Fark say.......

Feminist author Betty Friedan dies at 85. World loses not just a decent broad, but a fine piece of ass.

Peace on You

Those wacky Sudanese sign makers.

This gives me an idea - I'm going to open up a travel service for next year's Hajj, and charter some ferry boats, and pack those suckers full. Of course, I better get them to pay in full up front.

Dear fundie Islamists: Peace on you. Peace on all of you. Hypocrites.

Big role seen for Canada oil sands

Have I mentioned lately how much I love our Canadian neighbors to the North? They're good people.

More on those outraged Muslims

This is a great post on Neil Boortz's Blog about what it takes to outrage Muslims. Here is a snippet, but go read the entire thing.

Muslim outrage huh. OK ... let's do a little historical review. Just some lowlights:
Muslims fly commercial airliners into buildings in New York City. No Muslim outrage. Muslim officials block the exit where school girls are trying to escape a burning building because their faces were exposed. No Muslim outrage. Muslims cut off the heads of three teenaged girls on their way to school in Indonesia. A Christian school. No Muslim outrage. Muslims murder teachers trying to teach Muslim children in Iraq. No Muslim outrage. Muslims murder over 80 tourists with car bombs outside cafes and hotels in Egypt. No Muslim outrage. A Muslim attacks a missionary children's school in India. Kills six. No Muslim outrage. Muslims slaughter hundreds of children and teachers in Beslan, Russia. Muslims shoot children in the back. No Muslim outrage. Let's go way back. Muslims kidnap and kill athletes at the Munich Summer Olympics. No Muslim outrage. Muslims fire rocket-propelled grenades into schools full of children in Israel. No Muslim outrage. Muslims murder more than 50 commuters in attacks on London subways and busses. Over 700 are injured. No Muslim outrage. Muslims massacre dozens of innocents at a Passover Seder. No Muslim outrage. Muslims murder innocent vacationers in Bali. No Muslim outrage. Muslim newspapers publish anti-Semitic cartoons. No Muslim outrage. Muslims are involved, on one side or the other, in almost every one of the 125+ shooting wars around the world. No Muslim outrage. Muslims beat the charred bodies of Western civilians with their shoes, then hang them from a bridge. No Muslim outrage. Newspapers in Denmark and Norway publish cartoons depicting Mohammed. Muslims are outraged.

Dead children. Dead tourists. Dead teachers. Dead doctors and nurses. Death, destruction and mayhem around the world at the hands of Muslims .. no Muslim outrage ... but publish a cartoon depicting Mohammed with a bomb in his turban and all hell breaks loose.

Woman smuggles gun into county jail

After being transferred to the Ross County Jail, officers found Lundy still had a gun on her after it went off in the holding cell. Another woman in the cell said Lundy used the bathroom several times, and when Lundy sat on the bench, the gun went off.

While checking the gun, Officer Jonathan Robinson observed "it had off white-colored liquid substance on the gun with red specks. It appeared to be consistent with vaginal fluid."

That is no place to holster a gun.

Rumsfeld Likens Chavez's Rise to Hitler's

Rumsfeld to Chavez: Suck it!

Blogstorm

There's a Blogstorm starting. Give a visit to Michelle Malkin's blog - she does a better job of summing up what's going on much better than I could.

Cliff's notes version - the entire Muslim world is in an uproar over cartoons printed in a Danish newspaper depicting Mohammed. Riots across the globe are protesting the "insensitivity". And funny, the religion of peace's protests involves flag burnings, kidnappings, and threats of violence.

The part that'll make you sick, or at least it made me want to vomit, is that our very own policy wonks at the State Department have come down on the side of the rioters, calling the cartoons "offensive" and claiming the press needs to have some responsibility about what it's publishing.

And while it's apparently offensive to Muslims to have cartoons made of Mohammed, there is no uproar by the State Department over a piece of art depicting Osama bin Laden as Christ at the National Black Fine Art Show in New York City...

Craziness, sheer craziness. Read it all at her blog.

You know what, if you take a position on something, you're going to likely offend someone. By not taking a position on anything, you wind up as part of the new American Castrato we discussed last month.

update as of 20:38 on 2/3/6: check out the pictures of the so-called religion of peace in action. And oh yeah, the first several pictures I linked to are from Europe, not the Gaza strip.

These people are getting more worked up over a series of cartoons, which they say violates their religion. I don't seem to recall seeing riots of this nature after Zarqawi blew up the hotel in Jordan not too long ago - killing innocents - which is also supposedly against the tenets of their regligion. Interesting what people get worked up over, ain't it?

NYC girl scores 113 in HS game

Eat your heart out Kobe.

Britney Spears is pregnant with baby number two

Any hope of her regaining her hotness is now completely gone.

Tornadoes Blow Through New Orleans

Tornadoes early Thursday tore through New Orleans neighborhoods that were hit hard by Hurricane Katrina just five months earlier, collapsing at least one previously damaged house and battering the airport, authorities said.

It's all George Bush's fault!

In Turkish Movie, Americans Kill Innocents

You'd read this title and think that this was some low budget B movie. Looks like you'd be right based on the American "stars" in the show: Gary Busey and Billy Zane.

Looks like Turkey will make the movie with American actors (I know that's being generous) that Hollywood's too chicken shit to make.

Police shooting ruling challenged

News from England.
A High Court challenge has been launched to a verdict of lawful killing in the case of a man shot dead while holding a gun-shaped lighter.

I really hadn't thought about this until now, but the old bumper sticker that reads, "If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns" is not nearly as scary as this article. The real story in England is, "If guns are outlawed, only the police and military will have guns."

That's a very bad thing.

On (shooting) competition, Part I

Earlier on these pages, I have discussed shooting styles and gun choices. Tonight I am going to discuss competition.

As should be obvious to regular readers of this page, we here at the Tattler shoot. A LOT. Yes, like many of you, we spend some time at the range working on the basics - which I will call target shooting - grip, stance, group shooting, etc. We also spend an inordinate amount of time at home dry firing, perfecting and refining our skills. Target shooting and dry firing are done to make us better competitors, and the stronger competitors we are, the better shooters we become.

I have stressed before, and I’ll stress again, if you carry a gun whether you’re a cop on the street, a CHL holder, or in the military, then you should participate in whatever kind of competition that you can get to.

Sadly, it has been my experience that the vast bulk of people who carry guns as part of their daily routine could be much better shooters than they think they are. Now, as a side note: this is not a blanket statement. I know that there are MANY shooters out there that DO compete, and if they aren’t regular competitors I know there are MANY guys and gals out there that do have a regular routine and take their training seriously. I applaud you folks and wish that there were more.

Now, if you’re not competing, why should you start?

- Competition brings out the best in you. If you don’t compete, and you learned to shoot from the gun rags or from your uncle who served back in the big war, then chances are that you are a shooter, but that you don’t know how to shoot. Using myself as an example - I learned to shoot as a kid from my Dad, who served as a SEAL in Vietnam. And pretty much everything that he taught me, with the exception of how to line up the sights, was wrong. Competition has brought out the best in everything where it has been allowed to thrive. Things that work are used, and things that don’t are discarded. By regularly competing alongside capable shooters, you will learn the way that the best shooters in the world shoot. For a more detailed description of that style, see my earlier post on shooting.

- Does your gear work? Frankly, outside of actually learning to shoot, I think the single greatest benefit of shooting in competitions is learning if your gear works or not. By competing, you’ll quickly learn if your gun works, your holster works, your mags work, your bullets work, etc etc etc. I have personally seen many new shooters step to the line and draw their holster with their gun, their mags with their mag pouches or have their latest and greatest gun break. The sad fact is that there’s a lot of junk out there that’s being sold to you - and that includes everything from guns and equipment to the oil you use.

Think about it. Where would you rather find out your equipment isn’t up to the task of defending you? On the street, in your house, or on the range where you might be embarrassed a little, but no one gets hurt. There are things that have proven to work and things that have not. Chances are, if you are not putting the stress of competition on your equipment, you’re not going to find out if your gear works while you are standing stationary at the line firing no more than 1 round per 2 seconds.

- Have you ever run with a loaded gun in your hand? Again, it would be a fair guess that if you aren’t competing, the answer is no. It’s very likely, if you have to use your weapon to defend yourself, that there will be some degree of movement involved. And standing there target shooting will not prepare you for that challenge at all. Learning how to move with a gun in your hand in a fluid environment is a vital skill that should not be overlooked. Participating in action shooting will allow you to do this and learn to do it safely.

- Speaking of safety…. As I’m sure you know, people do all kinds of stupid stuff. Largely, when it comes to shooting, it’s more a result of ignorance than willful idiocy. Partially to blame is equipment that, at best sucks and at worst is downright dangerous. Specifically, holsters that are not rigid or that require two hands to put the gun in the holster cause more problems than I’d care to recognize. Here’s a tip - if you have to point the gun at any part of your body to holster the weapon then you need to find another holster.
When you participate in a match, you will either learn good muzzle discipline and trigger control or you will not be hanging out at the match for very long. Period, end of story. If you can’t control the muzzle, and can’t control your trigger finger, you have no business carrying a firearm. Shooting competitions will help you to learn both - I can think of two occasions where I have busted my ass coming into the next shooting position and slipped on loose brass or gravel and wound up feet in the air, ass on ground and muzzle kept downrange and no AD because my finger wasn’t wrapped around the trigger. If you think something like that is not possible in the “real world”, then you’re only kidding yourself.

- Learning. If you compete, you’re going to run into shooters better than you; regardless of what level of shooter you are - members of this blog included. You’ll quickly learn who the local stud is at the matches you go to and you’ll likely be able to learn more from him than all the gun rag articles in the past 10 years. Shooting is one of the few sports where you can rub elbows and bullshit with the best people in the sport. And almost to a man (and woman), they are easy to talk to and willing to share. How many other professional atheletes are available via cell phone to discuss a technique question? How often can you participate next to the greatest in the sport and then sit down and eat lunch or drink beer after the game is done? I’ve watched Robby Leatham - The Great One - who is arguably the greatest shooter in the world, take questions for about 30 minutes after the end of a loooong day’s shooting at Nationals. The questions ranged from everything from what kind of sights he liked to what kind of springs to put in your mags to how to look at attacking a particular course of fire. He answered them all with grace and panache and it was something he clearly didn’t have to do. If you don’t learn anything from your fellow shooters you’ve got no one to blame but yourself. However, as a note of warning - be careful who you seek advice from! Pick the shooter that is doing well, not the shooter who just looks good.

- Stress. Shooting at a competition will place signifigantly more stress on you than target shooting. Between the timer and the peanut gallery, you'll face a fair amount of stress, especially your first few times. If you can't handle the stress of shooting a match, can you handle the stress of having to defend your life?

- And let’s face it. Shooting is FUN! If you’re not having a good time shooting at a match, there’s something wrong with you. Go home and drink beer.

So, to summarize - by shooting at matches you’ll learn speed, accuracy, safety, what’s reliable and what’s not, how to handle stress and get good quality advice. And the topper is, you’ll have fun and hang out with like minded individuals. If you want to take the plunge and start shooting, you can find a local club at either idpa or uspsa.

If you were paying attention, you'll see this is Part I. Part II will discuss who competes, why some won't, and what's "tactical".... stay tuned.

And, as usual, if you have questions, ask. We’re here to help, folks.

Authorities seize "bathtub cheese"

What? That's illegal? Let's see: bathtub girl okay. Bathtub cheese illegal. Nope. Nothing wrong with this world.

The rat pokes his head out

Today while I was riding the elliptical at the gym I caught the breathless CNN talking heads prattling on like the idiots that they are. Al-Zawahri speaks!! They can't believe the bravery, the strong words, the rhetoric from the man so recently targeted by the CIA. They fear what this man and his brethren are capable of! What a display of power - only 2 weeks after narrowly escaping death he sends out a video!! Yes, our pals on CNN - gotta love em.

I almost threw up. And not from exertion.

Let's be realistic here.

Two weeks after the CIA told us they didn't get this pig eater, he speaks via a video tape smuggled to the mouthpiece of the terrorists, al-jazeera. Now for some reason, CNN reports the news from al-jazeera as if it's more accurate than the news from our government....

You'll note that it is being reported as a video tape, not a DVD, not a digital recording. A tape. If alqaida was so powerful, you'd think they have the ability to digitally record something and then instantly publish it on the internets. You know, like I'm doing right now.

Now, I'm not a CIA/NSA analyst. But the way I see it, to actually publish something to the internets yourself you need 3 things. Power, a computer, and a connection. By smuggling a video tape to al-jazeera this tells me that the cowards are missing either power, a computer, or more likely, a connection. Last time I checked, caves don't come standard with dial-up or DSL.

Or, could it be that the cowards know the instant they hook up to the internets they're signing their own death warrant? Nah, couldn't be that, they're so brave.

Now, as to the bulk of the message, how comical. Al-Zawahari calls Bush the "butcher of Washington" for killing 18 terrorist sympathizers. What's that make his fearless leader (you know, the guy who's too chicken shit to poke his head out of the cave he's hiding in), Osama? As in, the coward who killed 3,000 people on 9/11? Does that make him a butcher too, or is that different?

Another item of amusement is that Al-Zawahari (as do other of his cowardly brethren) calls us "crusaders". Here's a news flash, dickhead: the Crusades took place more or less from 1096 to 1270. That's almost 750 years ago. And I thought my ex-wife held a grudge.

And, in spite of your repeated demands of a truce, I'm sorry to say that you're still a hunted rat. And you're going to continue to be a hunted rat until you are dead. How ya sleepin' in that cave, pal?

Now, in the past, alqaida was well known for their simultaneous attacks on innocent people. Now it would appear that they're well known for their nearly (only 2 weeks apart!!) simultaneous communiques. CNN was sure impressed!

I'm also well aware that in the past, such communications from the rats would often lead to an attack on the West - usually on innocent people on their way to work or on vacation. Will that happen now? Only time will tell.

However, I can't help but be reminded of the oldish arcade game where you stood over the tabletop where the beaver/rat/squirrel/whatever it was poked it's head out into varying holes and it was your job to pound the snot out of the rat with the mallet. For some strange reason, it strikes me that Al-Zawahari and his cowardly friends are the rats, and we're holding the mallet. But that's just me.

As a final note, is it just me, or does Al-Zawahari look a lot like Mikhail Gorbachov with a turban and beard?

Senate Clears Way for Alito's U.S. Supreme Court Confirmation

Oh, by the way: I told you so.

Hopefully, Ted Kennedy will have an aneurysm over this. I'm sure he'll drown his, um, sorrows.

The Three Stooges live!

Nyuk, nyuk!

A hapless visitor tripped on his shoelace, tumbled down a flight of stairs and crashed into the vases, smashing them into smithereens.

Aw, how bad could it be?

The priceless vases, dating from the late 17th or early 18th century, were donated to the museum in 1948 and have become one of its most recognizable exhibits.

So, priceless is expensive, huh?

Why you, I oughtta...

Guns Win

Democrats and gun control are like puppies and chewing. You can beat them time and again, but they won't stop. They will always return to gun control, like moths to a flame.

Okay, so my similes (or is it metaphors or analogies? Should've paid attention in English) suck. You get the picture.

Had John Kerry not been stupid enough to go back to Washington to help defeat the firearms industry liability protection bill and get his picture taken with Ted Kennedy, Dianne Feinstein, and Chuck Schumer in the process, many more pro-gun voters might have stayed on his side or stayed away from the polls.

Luckily, Kerry just couldn’t help showing his true colors and much of the gun lobby noticed.

I've said it before: Democrats lack simple self-protection mechanisms. They continually are shooting themselves in the foot (sorry, I can't stop now...) with respect to the gun lobby, and gun owners in general. They honestly believe that guns are the root of all evil, and in spite of their collective constituency's mandate, continue to try to ban them. What's worse is that they try to put on airs as "sportsmen" and "hunters," posing for cheesy pictures while weilding grampa's shotgun during photo-ops that only a moron would believe was genuine. I think this sums it up nicely:

Of course Kerry’s gun posturing was a prime example of what former Democrat Senator John Patrick Moynihan referred to as, "…just boob bait for the bubbas."

THAT's what politicians think of you, kids.

The new American Castrato

JR, here's the link to the article we were talking about over breakfast after you used your little teasing non-masculine voice to try and entice me out of my 8 egg omelet.

The fellow makes some good points indeed.

"...You realize that you hear this voice every day if you bounce around a bit in our larger cities buying this or ordering that, and in general running into young people in the "service" sector -- be it coffee shop, video store, department store, boutique, bookstore, or office cube farm. It's a kind of voice that was seldom heard anywhere but now seems to be everywhere.
It is the voice of the neuter ."

I think this is why women find the males here on the Tattler so damn attractive. We talk like sailors, drive like maniacs, drink more beer than a fraternity (except for the ninnies Brad and Dan), smoke cigars and shoot guns. Hell, for that matter, the Girl is more of a man than most of the rest of the guys out there.

Speaking of.... One night, she actually brought a date to one of our weekly competitions. Computer geek. Nerdy type. Exactly the kind of castrato the article above talks about . I thought that while her choice in males was entertaining for the rest of us, I didn't think she'd be very entertained herself.

This poor lad was swimming in a sea of sharks and didn't know it.

After the match we went out to eat at one of the local Taqueria type eateries. You place your order, get your food and then go sit down and eat. The Girl's date got to the table first and then politely sat with his hands in his lap waiting for the rest of us, and the Girl to come join him at the table. I was the next person there, saw him waiting and told him to just dig in, there aren't any formalities with this bunch and your food's just gonna get cold.

Big D shows up next. He throws his tray down, points at the geek, and asked in his war voice if "he was dating Trixie".

The geek's response was a mumbled, gurgled sound that came out sounding like he had just shit in his pants.

Big D took that as a yes, and proceeded to rant "well you'd better be nice you little shit because I love her and if I ever find out you were mean to her I'm ripping your fucking head off."

Now here I am next to the geek, trying very hard to not blow queso and hot sauce out my nose. I think my ears popped several times with the effort, but I managed to swallow it all without dribbling into my beer. The poor kid is now ghostly white and has made a vain attempt to disappear under the table.

Big D continues to glare at the kid, and when the Girl comes to the table, there's another round of snickers and shooting beer out of our noses laughing uncontrollably.

I don't think the kid ever even ate anything, and finally just got up and left.

None of us told the Girl what had happened, but at some point in the future, the geek told her that he wasn't coming shooting with us any more because her friends intimidated him and then told her what happened.

I don't think she's had a date since.

Range Report

Woke up at the crack of dawn this morning to go shooting in Wichita Falls. Given the radar map, wouldn't you think there'd be a match?

You'd think wrong.

So, instead of a range report, here's a review of the IHOP restaurant on Swisher Road and I-35.

Catfish and The Girl ordered some scrambled-egg, burrito-lookin' behemoth stuffed with meat, cheese, beans, animal entrails, bug parts, and probably some floor sweepings. My breakfast partners were also served 3 pancakes each with their egg castles. I can honestly say that I've never seen so much food served for a single meal to a single person. I asked the waitress if anyone actually ate all that, and she said "yes." She looked like she knew of what she spoke. My friends (much to their credit) did not attempt to duplicate this feat. However, Catfish did get a doggy bag.

I had migas. No tortilla strips in the migas, way too much cheese, and a wee bit overboard on the jalapenos. I will give it 2 thumbs up for indigestion, though. Gas factor: high.

Overall, it was a very clean restaurant, with a very friendly staff, and full of large, sweaty patrons who apparently like bacon, cheese, and gravy.

I give it 2 stars.

My restaurant rating system is based on how long it takes before you have to go to the bathroom after eating there:
* - next morning
** - within the same day
*** - within 2 hours
**** - before you leave the restaurant
***** - Why do you think they call them Depends?

Canadians Threaten US With War Rhetoric

That's it. Those French-speaking, beaver-loving, bacon-making, hoose-dwelling Canadians are asking for it, eh?

"The United States defends its sovereignty and the Canadian government will defend our sovereignty," Harper told reporters in Ottawa. "It is the Canadian people we get our mandate from, not the ambassador of the United States."

Hey, Canuck - we've invaded crappier countries than yours for worse reasons. Might wanna just get back to your hockey and faggy "football."

Huge Beaver!

...the crew put it on a scale and discovered it weighed 60 pounds. Williams said they also measured the beaver and found it to be 42 inches long.

"Whoever hit this bad boy, they knew they hit something," Williams said.

Blogger: User Profile: thegirl

Funny thing. My profile is "JR," and nobody visits it. However, the profile known as "thegirl" gets beaucoup hits. Why is that?

Perverts.

Hey, Girl - wanna generate some traffic? One word: Boobies. Say no more.

Mars Images Reveal Recent Volcanic And Glacial Activity

How can this be?? As far as I know, George Bush has yet to step on the surface of Mars, and so far, he can't be blamed for the global warming trend that's coming in Mars' future.... I'm stymied though, because according to the eco-clowns, there would be no global warming if not for mankind's (or should I say, America's) insatiable appetite for fossile fuels??

"James Head, professor of geological sciences at Brown University and an author on the Nature papers, said the glacial data suggests recent climate change in Mars’ 4.6-billion-year history. The team also concludes that Mars is in an “interglacial” period. As the planet tilts closer to the sun, ice deposited in lower latitudes will vaporize, changing the face of the Red Planet yet again."

Yet here we have a scientific journal telling us that Mars' ice deposits are going to be melted away! Perhaps the CIA has secretly been developing industries on Mars that are wreaking such havoc on the red planet?

The Countertop Chronicles: The Gunnies

Hey, lookit us! The Texican Tattler has been nominated for a Gunnie Award, in the category of "Best Range Reports". Pop on over there, and give us a vote. Heaven knows we could use the support...

Official site of the Pittsburgh Steelers - Article

Official site of the Pittsburgh Steelers - Article

OK, for those that missed it, I thought I'd let everyone know the Pittsburgh Steelers are going to the Super Bowl.

Jerome, The Bus, Bettis is going home to Detroit for the biggest game of his career.

Just wanted to throw that out there for everyone.

Pittsburgh.

Super Bowl.

Go Steelers!

A Cellphone Powered by Urine

Pissed when your cell battery dies? Urine luck!

The Michael Bane Blog: Proof Positive That Michael Doesn't Know Everything

The Michael Bane Blog: Proof Positive That Michael Doesn't Know Everything

Just when we were all having a good laugh at non-shooting experts and new guns and such. Mr, no dare I say, Sir John Moses Browning is rolling over in his grave at about 5,600 rpm.

Yes folks, that's Kimber, a major player in the 1911 bastion of all things really old and heavy. Is introducing a striker fired, polymer full sized gun in, are you ready for this, .40 S&W. With what it looks like a possible entry into the US Military trials.

I will pause now so all JMB followers can take a deep breath and get their heart to start beating again. I guess it's going to be an interesting SHOT show this year.

Jess: I love my breasts

So do we.

So, you wanna buy your first pistol?

As a public service to our readers, I thought I’d take a moment to tell you what you should do when you’re out looking for your first pistol. The usual disclaimers apply - you may buy one of the pistols I recommend and wind up with a piece of crap built on Friday afternoon when all the builder wanted to do was go out and grab a beer. And, you and you alone are responsible for your behavior. Don't come here whining to us because you did somthing stupid.

But, if you take my advice, chances are you’re going to be in pretty good shape.

Now, to the good stuff.

In my opinion, if you’re carrying a pistol for personal defense, there’s a few characteristics to take into consideration:

- Reliability. Probably the most important quality in your new pistol. Buying a reliable pistol will cost you more than a Saturday night special but hey - how much is your life worth? Your pistol should reliably feed a variety of ammunition - including ball ammo (cheap to shoot) or self defense ammo (more expensive to shoot but again, how much is your life worth?) The pistol should function whether it’s clean or dirty, wet or dry, etc etc etc. It should also do so with no or a very minimum of reliability work done to it. A bare minimum of maintenance should be required so that if you were to leave your pistol sitting on your bed stand for a month or two, it would work the first time you picked it up.

- Ergonomics. You want a pistol that you can comfortably carry and shoot and one that fits your hands. You also want a pistol that has simple, easy to understand and use controls. The controls such as your slide release, mag release, and any safeties need to be where your fingers naturally fall without any second guessing on your part. Another ergonomic feature that is of vast importance to the performance of the pistol is the height of the bore over your hand. You want a pistol that doesn’t raise the bore (the barrel) high over your hand. Generally speaking, the higher the bore is over your hand, the more the muzzle will flip when you shoot making rapid aimed shots difficult.

- High magazine capacity. Let’s face it. More bullets are good. Make sure your first defensive pistol has the capacity to carry 14-17 rounds. Hollywood has created the mythology that one shot from a pistol will kill or debilitate an attacker immediately. Sadly, that’s just not true folks. Statistics show us that over 80% of all people shot with a handgun live. So, if you have the ability to put multiple rounds into an attacker, you’re going to be better off. Period. That’s why I rely on carbines for my main defensive weaponry.

- The ability to mount a light. If you’re using your new pistol to protect your house, chances are if you ever have to use it, it will be at night. Having the ability to mount a light directly onto your pistol is an option you don’t want to be without.

Ok, so I’ve listed a few characteristics here. To review, you want something that’s reliable, fits your hand, has a high mag capacity, and can mount a light. That cuts out a LOT of pistols that the gun shop commandos will recommend.

For starters:
Sigs. Sigs are extremely well engineered guns. Over engineered would be a better way to say it. While Sigs ARE reliable, their controls are not intuitive and the bore sits way high over your hand. You’ll hear a bunch of smack about how this group or that carries Sigs blah blah blah but I’ll ask you: when was the last time a shooter using a Sig has won a pistol competition of any kind? Out of decades of action pistol shooting, I can think of ONE. Extra credit for you if you know who and when.
H&K. H&K’s tend to be very reliable as well, but again - controls are in the wrong place and the bore sits high over your hand. Also, the bigger calibers (as in .40 and .45) are simply huge pistols that won’t fit most people’s hands.
Beretta. For one thing, Berettas tend to blow up fairly early in their service life; they are also big and bulky and have awkward controls. Yuck.

There are more that I would never spend any money on, but I don’t want to lose you here….

That leaves you with basically two choices that I would not hesitate to recommend to the first time pistol buyer:
Glocks and the newish Springfield XDs. I’ve shot thousands of rounds through Glocks and about 2000 (so far) through my XD. Both meet all the requirements I detailed above. If I were you, and were picking my first pistol, I’d go to a gun range and rent them both and see which one fits your hand the best.

Disclaimer: I love 1911’s. I carry and shoot 1911’s a LOT. Buy in my opinion they are not necessarily suited to the first time shooter and I would not recommend one to a newbie.

As to where to buy your new pistol. I would at all costs generally avoid gun shops unless you know someone at the shop, or you know that the owner is a shooter. That’s an important concept. Guys that are shooters and not just salesmen will know what works, what’s most likely to work for you, and won’t try and sell you the latest and greatest piece of shit to come down the pike. Your average gun store salesman will only know what he’s read in the gun rags, or what the salesmen have told him when they’re dropping off product. If you’re not sure, ask the guy (or gal) behind the counter if they shoot any competition. If they don’t shoot any uspsa, idpa, bianchi cup, steel challenge, etc - then that store’s not worth your time. If the guy behind the counter talks trash and says something like “I shoot a lot - last year I shot over 500 rounds!” (true story I actually overheard) 500 rounds a year is squat. There are some days on the range we’ll shoot that many rounds before lunch. So keep in mind that the average gun shop guy likely doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about. Some DO, but it has been my experience that most DO NOT.

A cheaper option is to (generally) buy your new pistol at a gun show. Word of warning though - gun shows are great (usually) for buying a new gun at a discount - but only if you know what you want and what it would cost you at the gun store itself. There are deals to be had, but you need to find them and be an educated shopper.

After you buy your new gun I would run as fast as you could to the range and find an action shooting club to begin shooting with. Chances are that someone will be there to help you learn to shoot your new wundergun and help you from doing stupid things that you learned from TV. Or, you can always drop us a line here at the Tattler. We’re here to help folks.

Now, any questions?

Cool Person Test

See if you are cool.

CIA confirms speaker on tape is bin Laden - International Terrorism - MSNBC.com

Oooh. Let me put on my boots, so I can shake in them.

I'm more surprised that the CIA believes UBLs dusty ass is still alive. All that aside, it does smack of the old UBL dependence on traditional American mainstream media's penchant for hyperbole:

Bin Laden said he was directing his message to the American people after polls showed that “an overwhelming majority of you want the withdrawal of American troops from Iraq but (Bush) opposed that desire.”

A NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll from last month does not support that. Two-thirds of Americans surveyed opposed an immediate withdrawal. But 60 percent believed the United States should reduce its troop levels in Iraq.

(Editorial: funny how the MSM uses the MSM to refute this claim, huh? Ah, the irony.) Considering that this goat-smelling, hut-dwelling mud-eater probably hasn't been out of a cave in a while, he might be surprised to learn that not everyone in the USofA buys the MSMs crapola anymore.

“The delay in similar operations happening in America has not been because of failure to break through your security measures. The operations are under preparation and you will see them in your homes the minute they are through (with preparations), with God’s permission.”

Well, I guess you don't have permission, donkey-balls. Suuuuure - you're not kicking our ass because you don't want to. Right.

“We do not mind offering you a long-term truce with fair conditions that we adhere to,” he said. “We are a nation that God has forbidden to lie and cheat. So both sides can enjoy security and stability under this truce so we can build Iraq and Afghanistan, which have been destroyed in this war.

“There is no shame in this solution, which prevents the wasting of billions of dollars that have gone to those with influence and merchants of war in America,” he said.

Take your "truce" and shove it, goatherd. The only peace you're going to get is the one that comes with death.

U.S. Strike Killed al Qaeda Bomb Maker

Good news on the war front. Looks like the Pakistani strike earlier this week was pretty useful after all. Took out a major al qaeda bomb maker; all in all not a bad day's work.

For those sniveling whiney liberals who will lament the loss of so called "innocent" life in this strike, here's a little message - you don't want to get killed when we take out scumbags like this? Then perhaps it would be in your best interest to not associate with known scumbags.

Self-proclaimed vampire running for governor of Minnesota

See what happens? First they elect (of all things) a pro wrestler for governor, now look who's coming out to play:

“Politics is a cut-throat business,” said Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey, who said he plans to announce his bid for governor on Friday on the ticket of the Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party.

Freakin' weirdos. Must be all that cold weather.

N.Y. Man Gets Corvette Back After 37 Years

What a great story. The 68-72 Vette has always been a car I have coveted. I can't imagine getting something stolen like that and getting it back 37 years later. Hell, I was ecstatic when I got my $100 bicycle back after being stolen. Check out the picture. The car is a different color than it was originally, but it is beautiful.

Poster was living in New York in January 1969, when the car he'd bought for $6,000 three months earlier was stolen from a parking garage. Poster had not insured it against theft because he could not afford to do so.

The Hildabeast on the attack

Over the MLK/Bash Bush holiday, the Hildabeast came out swinging. In typical libby style, she wants us all to believe that history started today.

She screeched:

''I predict to you that this administration will go down in history as one of the worst that has ever governed our country.''

Wow. How soon we all forget. Or, should I say, how soon she'd like us to forget:

Travelgate.
Waco.
Ruby Ridge.
Mogadishu.
Brady Bill.
Elian Gonzales.
Whitewater.
Chinese fundraising.
Loran giving technology to the Chicoms.
Rwanda.
No controlling legal authority.
North Korean Nukes.
Passing up a chance to bag Bin Laden.
The Kole.
Kohbar Towers.
Socialized Health Care.

I could go on. And on. And on.

If you want to see a fairly comprehensive list of scandals belonging to the scumbag otherwise known as President Clinton, check out this link.

And Hillary just wants us to forget it all.

Tom Daschle considers bid for president

If the Democratic party calls, I'm going to give money to Daschle's election campaign. If the Democratic Party can do for Tom Daschle what they did for John Kerry and what's-his-name (you know, the Vice-Presidential candidate...what IS his name?), then I want to do my part for America.

New Orleans Mayor Apologizes for Remark

On Tuesday, Nagin said his comments about God were inappropriate and stemmed from a private conversation he had with a minister earlier. "I need to be more sensitive and more aware of what I'm saying," he said.

Oh, Ray. Don't be so hard on yourself. Let me break it down for you: you simply need to pull your head out of your ass, resign, and apologize to the City of New Orleans. Then, go jump in Lake Ponchartrain with pork chops tied around your neck, and let the sharks eat you. I think that would pretty much set things right for most people.

Brittany Murphy Is Reportedly Engaged

It's old farts like Bruce Willis, bedding down young things like Brittany Murphy, that make normal, everyday, ordinary guys go buy red corvettes, have comb-overs, and use Viagra. Has Hollywood no shame?

I heard the Olsen twins turned 18 recently...

MSM: "What, us lie?"

In another typical week for the MSM, (and it's only Monday night) two major media outlets are caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

Story #1 involves our old friend the New York Times. I'm sure you're surprised. The NYT attempts to use a lovely picture to capture our heart strings and feel the pain of a Pakistani family ruined by the recent American airstrikes that were hunting an alqaeda thugs. The problem is that the image shows us not a missile, as the Times originally waned, but an old unexploded artillery shell. I'm sure the picture was not staged. You kind of have to wonder if the Times was not caught with its pants down (again) would they have offered the retraction?

Story #2 involves CNN. Again, I'm sure your surprised. I mean, after all, the network that stayed in Iraq at the whim of Saddam can't be expected to do anything else but get the little details wrong. After all, they've made a business out of stretching the truth. In this case, while covering a speech by the thug in chief of Iran they confused the word "weapon" for the word "power". Oops. Minor detail, right? Kind of like "10,000 dead in New Orleans"....

And oh yes, should anyone be confused of where I stand: to the thug in chief of Iran, you're still a punk ass thug.

Wow, I wonder what they'll screw up by the end of the week!

Mayor Nagin: New Orleans Will Be 'Chocolate' Again

Ow, my tongue. It hurts from biting it.

My Suicide

As the regular readers of this blog know, I took the plunge over the holidays and bought all the requisite equipment to start loading my own ammunition (read my saga). I've made about 500 rounds so far, and all is well - I'll reach ROI on this baby in no time. But I digress...

I live in an adorable little apartment - it's a 2-story, with my own 1-car garage downstairs and the living quarters upstairs. So this morning I go downstairs and load up about 150 rounds of ammo, then I throw some cases in the tumbler for cleaning while I come back upstairs to case gauge my picture-perfect rounds. Then it's back downstairs, where I decide to use the bullet-puller to dismantle a few not so perfect rounds. It's the kinetic kind, where you put the round in the thingy then pound it on the floor to dislodge the bullet and recover the components. Over all the noise of the tumbler I hear pounding (other than my own) - sounds like it's my front door, so I go out to the front entryway and look through the peephole (safety first!) - I see nothing. Then I hear my garage door going up - WTF? I go out the front door and come face to face with my new neighbor - an elderly woman who has a horrified look on her face. I look in my garage, and the leasing lady is in there opening my car door. I'm like "Hellooo, can I help you?", and she's got that same horrified I've-just-seen-a-ghost look that my neighbor was sporting.

Turns out that my new neighbor thought that I was trying to kill myself by running my car inside the garage, and that I had changed my mind and was banging on the wall for help. At least she just called the leasing office and not the police. They were both so shocked to find me alive and well that neither one ever asked me what the hell I was doing in there, or what all the strange equipment was for. I'm still expecting the police to come by and check out my "meth lab". Oh yeah - not once did they ring my doorbell or try to call me on the phone.

As I'm writing this, I'm hearing a strange arrhythmic thumping noise coming from one of the other apartments. Ohmygosh, someone has taken the entire family next door hostage! They're being systematically dismembered by a band of axe-wielding psychopaths! Call someone quick!! Or maybe it's just tennis shoes in a dryer. Nah....

P.S. JR gets credit for the title of this post - thanks!

Florida 8th-grader wielding pellet gun shot down

Leave it to a California news source to dance in the blood of children.

Make no mistake - this is a tragic story. A kid brought an air-soft gun to school, apparently to impress, intimidate, or whatever. He took it WAY too far, as evidenced by painting over the orange barrel tip in an effort to make the pistol appear real.

It worked.

The kid created a situation. He waved the gun around like it was real. A SWAT officer had to shoot him. I read an account where the officer even rode in the ambulance with the kid, talking to him all the way. The kid died today. I expect that police officer will have a very hard time of this.

Now, enter our media. Look at the hyperbole they put on this:

Last week, a fourth-grader in San Bernardino brought a similar gun to school and sprayed plastic pellets at his classmates during recess. No lives were lost, but some of the students hit had bruises.

There's no waiting period, no background check, no license needed to own one of these guns -- but even retailers say they should not be considered toys. They look, feel and operate like the real thing. The difference is, these guns aren't lethal -- although some say they are still dangerous.

"No lives were lost." Mercy. They are toys that shoot plastic pellets. Plain and simple. They sting a little, but are not capable of lethal damage.

There's no doubt that some toys can look like the real thing. However, bad intent is just that: bad intent.

This incident will serve as the nexus for a much more insidious movement: let's ban toy guns. It'll make banning the real thing that much easier.

Don't be fooled, folks.

Miss America Eyes Hip, Wholesome Comeback

Miss Congeniality, a title awarded to a competitor by her peers, will make a comeback after being pulled from the show in 1974. Each segment of the pageant, such as the evening-gown competition, will be introduced by clips of historical highlights. The final selection process goes from 10 to five and then to three finalists to help build suspense.

Quote of the year

I've seen this quote attributed to both a Marine sniper and a SF sniper. Is it true? Who knows, but it's perfect.

A _____ sniper was being interviewed by a Rueters reporter in Afghanistan. When asked by the reporter what he felt when he killed Afghan terrorists, the sniper shrugged and said "recoil".

The Market Hall Gun Show

I've been meaning to get around to this for some time now. Executive summary of this post: the Market Hall Gun Show sucks.

The Story
Catfish and I went to the Market Hall gun show this last Saturday morning. His goal was to purchase some 7.62x39 ammo, and I was on a quest to trade in my Glock 17 for a more concealable Glock 26 or even 27. I boxed up my freshly-scrubbed 17 in a nice new Glock box, with 6 or 7 mags, some hi-cap, some 10-rounders. My Glock is no crappy gun. It's got Heinie race-cut sights, a very nice skateboard tape job, extended mag release, T.R. Graham's custom lock-up, some springs, and a decent trigger job. Sure, it's had a few rounds run through it (50-60,000?), but it's in perfect condition. I made up a little 8.5x11 sign (with big, easy-to-read letters) advertising what I had, and what I wanted.

We met at the range, then went over to Market Hall. Traffic was heavy, and the parking lot was mostly full. There were more pickup trucks there than you could shake a redneck at.

There was a line to get in, where we got randomly chatted up by an older guy who must've surmised that since we had guns, we must like to talk about football. Nice guy, though. It cost SEVEN dollars to get in, but only after my gun was checked and strapped, of course. We took off to the north side of the hall, because that's where the bathrooms were.

The first thing I noticed was that I wasn't immediately set upon by the dealers who have tables at the entrance. They usually swarm you and want to know what you've got. Then they offer you a stupidly low price for it, and act all hurt when you tell them to get bent. However, on this side of the hall - nothin'.

The second thing I noticed was the proliferation of...what's the word I'm looking for?...ah, yes: crap. Piles of clothing, candles, knife sharpeners, antique militaria, etc. It looked like a frickin' flea market. We almost asked how much the mannequin in the wheelchair was, until we realized it was someone's granny wearing a Russian Army hat, having a little snooze.

The third thing I noticed were the prices. Not a bargain to be had at the whole show. Gunpowder was more expensive than what I can buy at Sportsman's Warehouse. Ammo was scarce, and expensive. Even bulk bullets weren't priced competitively. There were no outstanding bargains on handguns, but AR-15 prices seemed reasonable. Catfish couldn't find 7.62x39 ammo in any appreciable quantities, but found enough to get through the weekend.

Driving a hard bargain
On the south side of the hall, the wheelers and dealers pounced. "Whatcha got?" "How much you want?" All this in spite of the sign, written in English that stated, "TRADE." Exasperated, I offered that I'd take $400 for it. I got no better offer than $375.

Finally, I found a used gun dealer, who had a plethora of over-priced firearms, but amongst all that lay my goal: a used Glock 26. His asking price: $460.00. However, I figured he couldn't pass up a straight up trade for a full-sized Glock 17, in similar condition, PLUS all those mags. He was busy with a customer, and asked us to wait.

After about 15 minutes, he finally got to us. "Hi, wonder if you'd be interested in trading that 26 for a 17?" "How much you got in that Glock?" "Huh? I dunno - let's just trade!" "How much are you asking for your 17?" "About 400 bucks, I guess."

I had to point out which handgun was the 26 to him. Uh-oh. He looked at his price tag ($460.00), looked at my 17, and said, "nah - I'll pass." "You mean to tell me you're going to pass on an even trade for a more valuable firearm?" "Yep."

As Catfish will testify, I made a comment questioning his heritage (or was it his sex life? Whatever.), and stormed off, muttering to myself like a crazy person ("stupid *$&@!#, make me wait for 15 minutes, pass up a trade that was to HIS advantage, mutter, mutter, mutter..."), and resigned myself right then and there that the gun show was no place to buy, sell, or trade guns.

What's this world coming to?

Anybody got a Glock 26 they wanna trade for a Glock 17? Seriously.

DNA Tests Confirm Executed Va. Man Guilty - Yahoo! News

"An innocent man is going to be murdered tonight," the 33-year-old said moments before he was electrocuted on May 20, 1992. "When my innocence is proven, I hope America will realize the injustice of the death penalty as all other civilized countries have.

You wish.

Coleman went to his death proclaiming his innocence, and a finding that he was unjustly executed would have been explosive news that almost certainly would have had a powerful effect on the public's attitude toward capital punishment. Death penalty opponents have argued for years that the risk of a grave and irreversible mistake by the criminal justice system is too great to allow capital punishment.

Alas for old Roger Keith Coleman:

The report from the Centre of Forensic Sciences in Toronto concluded there was almost no conceivable doubt that Coleman was the source of the sperm found in the victim.

"The probability that a randomly selected individual unrelated to Roger Coleman would coincidentally share the observed DNA profile is estimated to be 1 in 19 million," the report said.

Here's the best part:

James McCloskey, executive director of Centurion Ministries, had been fighting to prove Coleman's innocence since 1988. The two shared Coleman's final meal together — cold slices of pizza — just a few hours before Coleman was executed.

"I now know that I was wrong. Indeed, this is a bitter pill to swallow," McCloskey said, describing Thursday's findings as "a kick in the stomach" and adding that he felt betrayed by Coleman.

Mmmm. Toasty.

Let this serve as a lesson to all the naifs of the world: bad guys typically lie, and they typically protest their innocence. So much so, in fact, that they even convince themselves. And that, dear reader, is what makes them so dangerous.

Adeimantus: Study Reveals Joe Biden Is Judiciary Committee's Biggest Gasbag

Follow-up to previous Alito article.

This is priceless, and I'd like to thank my newest blogroll member for this.

Let me summarize the Senate judiciary committee hearings today:

Me. Me, me, me, me. I. Me. Myself. I. Me, me, me, me. I, I, I. Me. Oh, and me.

Quoth Senator Joe Biden:

I mean, I believe you that you were unaware of it. But here I was, University of Delaware graduate, a sitting United States senator, I was aware of it because I was up there on the campus. I mean, it was a big deal. It was a big deal, at least in our area of the Delaware Valley, if Princeton, Penn, the schools around there had this kind -- because the big thing was going on at Brown at the time as well.

But, wait - there's more:

I mean, I really didn't like Princeton. I was an Irish Catholic kid who thought it had not changed like you concluded it had.

I admit, one of my real dilemmas is I have two kids who went to Ivy League schools. I'm not sure my Grandfather Finnegan will ever forgive me for allowing that to happen.

But all kidding aside, I wasn't a big Princeton fan. And so maybe that is why I focused on it and no one else did. But I remember it at the time.

And so it went today. Please read the rest of this fine post to get the numbers. It's truly a hoot.

Man Died After Ducking Flying Shrimp

Flying shrimp. Just one more reason I don't eat seafood. Remember, the shrimp would kill and eat you if they could...

Alito Begins High Court Confirmation Hearings

I like the headline on Fark:

The senator who let a girl drown in his car is asking Alito a lot of questions about matters involving the Concerned Alumni of Princeton that are 20 to 33 years in the past

The typical tenured hypocrites are at it again. Kennedy, Schumer, and Feinstein are doing their dead-level best to undermine yet another Bush Supreme Court nominee.

Feinstein worries about abortion. Kennedy worries about presidential powers. Schumer is just worried about anything that doesn't lean left. They're all a bunch of hypocritical, lying, anti-American liberals.

Their tactics were so offensive and bullying that Alito's wife left the hearings in tears. Nice.

What's really funny is that in spite of all their grandstanding, bullying, and self-importance, Alito's confirmation will move forward. Yes, that's a prediction.

100s hurt in ritual slaughter

There it is folks: your stupid headline of the day.

Of course, the actual event doesn't appear to be all that smart, either.

Not only is Britney fat, but she tops the 'worst dressed' list

This post is for all you Britney fans out there.

We love you!

Really.

LOS ANGELES (Jan. 10) - Britney Spears topped Mr. Blackwell's 46th annual "Worst Dressed" list for wearing clothes that he said made her look like an "over-the-hill Lolita."

Iran resumes research into nuclear fuel

From the other JR:
This is proving the UN is like the mall security guard. No power/balls for rules enforcement against trouble makers.

"You kids better stop that or I'll have to grab my flashlight and walk away"

Bird flu may be more common, less deadly

For all you Chicken Little sociopaths who are scrubbing your environment, gargling with Lysol, and avoiding human contact, please note this article. Also, note how the flu is spread:

So far, the bird flu deaths in Turkey involved children playing with dead chickens.

"Hey, Bobby - whatcha got there?" "Oh, hi, Timmy! It's a dead chicken. Wanna play with it?" "Heck yeah! I'll be Colonel Sanders, and you can be the pimply-faced restaurant manager!"

So, what's our bird-flu family profile? Let's take a look:

The new study involved 45,476 randomly selected residents of a rural region where bird flu is rampant among poultry - Ha Tay province west of Hanoi. More than 80 percent lived in households that kept poultry and one-quarter lived in homes reporting sick or dead fowl.

I don't know about the rest of you city folk, but we quit keeping poultry in the house some time ago.

And now for the big scientific conclusion:

"The closer the contact with sick or dead poultry, the higher the risk for flu-like illness," Thorson said. That finding "speaks strongly against it being a circumstantial finding."

Here's a health tip, American citizens: don't play with sick or dead poultry, and chances are you'll be just fine. Now get out from under the bed and get back to work.

Republicans race to replace DeLay

More fun with names!

Among the candidates seeking to succeed DeLay in the No. 2 Republican leadership post are Rep. Roy Blunt of Missouri, who has been acting majority leader in DeLay's absence, and Rep. John Boehner of Ohio, who announced his candidacy Sunday.

Looks like a double boner day! Uh-huh-uh-huh-huh-uh-huhuh-uh.

Gynaecologist to change gender

Colin Bone, who works at The Queen Elizabeth Hospital in King's Lynn, is to go on extended leave and will return to the hospital next autumn as a woman.

Doctor Bone. Beavis and Butthead surely have a tear in their eyes.

"Colin has lived his life as a male with a male body but all the time with an inner understanding of being female," she said.

"Throughout Colin's life he has found some aspects of his identity as a source of confusion and bewilderment."

That, and he's not the prettiest man I ever saw. I can't imagine he/she/it will be any more attractive sans penis.

NASA to Return Comet Samples to Earth

Michael Crichton wrote a book titled "The Andromeda Strain." Ring any bells?

First it faces a blistering descent, piercing the atmosphere at a record-breaking 29,000 mph the fastest re-entry of any man-made probe.

Its target is Dugway Proving Ground, a Rhode Island-sized Army base southwest of Salt Lake City where in 2004 the ill-fated Genesis probe crashed on live television after its parachute failed to open. Despite that crash, scientists recovered enough solar wind atoms for study.

What could possibly go wrong?

The real reason the West is in danger of extinction

One of the most cogent pieces of writing I've read in a while. Again, it proves why it's easy to be liberal. This is one helluva long read. But worth every second it takes to read it.

"... in the typical election campaign in your advanced industrial democracy, the political platforms of at least one party in the United States and pretty much all parties in the rest of the West are largely about what one would call the secondary impulses of society--government health care, government day care (which Canada's thinking of introducing), government paternity leave...."

That's right folks, the job of the government is to protect us, not provide for us. Shocking, eh?

"There are many trouble spots around the world, but as a general rule, it's easy to make an educated guess at one of the participants: Muslims vs. Jews in "Palestine," Muslims vs. Hindus in Kashmir, Muslims vs. Christians in Africa, Muslims vs. Buddhists in Thailand, Muslims vs. Russians in the Caucasus, Muslims vs. backpacking tourists in Bali. "

Wow, I'm sure even the stupidest euro weenie could make the connection here. Maybe.

And to show just how far our wonderful neighbors to the north are taking multiculturalism, and how far they're willing to go to not insult anyone, Canada has willingly and knowingly let a terrorist wounded in the fighting in Afghanistan (yes, a terrorist) come home to Canada to seek medical treatment. "Nonetheless, the prime minister of Canada thought Boy Khadr's claims on the public health system was an excellent opportunity to demonstrate his own deep personal commitment to "diversity." Asked about the Khadrs' return to Toronto, he said, "I believe that once you are a Canadian citizen, you have the right to your own views and to disagree."

Right. You can say that as they're hacking your head off while you're still alive. See how far that gets ya.

Read it all.

Sniper shot that took out an insurgent killer from three quarters of a mile

Nice. 1250 meters with a .308 is gawd awful far. Helluva shot.

A couple interesting tidbits:

- the enemy sniper was hiding in a hospital - isn't that civilized?

- it's nice to see that not everyone is eager to become a feminized, euro-trash version of the 21st century male: "The one-shot-one-kill thing is one of beauty but killing all the bad dudes is even more attractive," said Staff Sgt Gilliland, whose motto is "Move fast, shoot straight and leave the rest to the counsellors in 10 years" and signs off his e-mails with "silent souls make.308 holes".


Here's the quiz of the day:
Take a look at the picture in the story and tell me what's wrong in that picture.

Ya 'Mon: Jamaica is Murder Capital of the World

I hate to say it, but:

GUNS ARE BANNED IN JAMAICA.

Thank you for your kind attention.

Human Head Found Floating Off Fla. Island

Hey - whattya call a man with no arms and no legs swim...aw, nevermind.

Buchanan goes crazy

I generally find Pat Buchanan an intelligent author and speaker. However, in this WND article, I think he's completely lost his mind.

On one hand, he's admitting that Iran's thug in chief is dangerous.

"Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who says Israel should be "wiped off the map" and the Holocaust is a myth, is still on message. On New Year's Day, he charged Europeans with setting up a "Jewish camp" in the Middle East, with the most sinister of motives.
"Don't you think that continuation of genocide by expelling Jews from Europe was one of their aims in creating a regime of occupiers of Al Quds [Jerusalem]?" Ahmadinejad was quoted by Iran's official Islamic Republic News. "Isn't that an important question?" "

But on the other hand, all he wants us to do is "talk" with the thug. Right. Hitler was an easy guy to rationalize with right Mr. Chamberlain?

Pat goes on to try and rationalize the point that since Iran has signed the nuclear Non Proliferation Treaty that they will, more importantly, abide by said treaty:

"Tehran is telling Bush: We are not going to be the only country on earth to have signed the NPT and then be told by you we cannot exercise our rights under the treaty. "

How many treaties did Hitler sign swearing he wouldn't build his military forces in the 1930s? How many treaties did Hitler sign swearing that, no really, all he really wanted was the Sudatenland?

Buchanan then jumps fully into the Sheehan camp by using the same exact rhetoric they used to argue against taking out Iraq:

"As of today, Iran is not a nuclear threat."

Ok, let me get this right. Today, Iran is not a nuclear threat. What about next year? In 5 years? 10? You do the math. Would you rather take on a nuclear Iran, or one that has had its nuclear capability removed? Which one do you think would be more expensive in both lives and money? Because if you think that a nuclear Iran would NOT be a threat to the United States, I've got a bridge for you to buy in Brooklyn.

He further buries himself in the weakness of his position by saying essentially, yeah, so even if Iran can build ONE nuclear bomb, they've only got ONE and we've got thousands. How many EMP bursts would it take to severely damage our country Mr. Buchanan? How many nuclear bombs launched off an oil tanker would it take to destroy Washington DC? Houston? New York? LA? You think that Katrina damaged our economy?

Why do you think we're so concerned over the fact that Iran is building a nuclear bomb, but for some reason, a nuclear Pakistan and India don't seem to bother us? Could it be that Pakistan and India don't go about calling the United States the Great Satan? Could it be that neither country is ruled by a thug? Could it be that neither country is stating they want to wipe an important ally of ours off the map?

I don't know what the answer is. But giving concessions to the Iranians for being punks is the wrong move.

Mexico Retaliates for Border Wall Plan

This is rather oldish news I've been sitting on; too busy to put something down "on paper".

I can't begin to tell you how much the tone of this article infuriates me.

"Many Mexicans, especially those who have spent time working in the U.S., feel the proposal is a slap in the face to those who work hard and contribute to the U.S. economy."

There's clearly no denying that illegal immigrants do a lot work here. There's also no denying they cost this country billions of dollars a year - health care costs and education costs alone are absolutely insane.

"Fernando Robledo, 42, of the western state of Zacatecas, says the proposals could stem migration and disrupt families by breaking cross- border ties."

The whole point, Senor Robeldo, is to stem migration. Dumb ass.

"The House bill, passed on a 239-182 vote, would also enlist military and local law enforcement to help stop illegal entrants and require employers to verify the legal status of their workers."

Good, it's about time.

"Mexicans are outraged by the proposed measures, especially the extension of the border wall, which many liken to the Berlin Wall."

History lesson folks - the Berlin Wall kept the enslaved East Berliners from escaping to the West, and Freedom. This wall would help protect the United States from ILLEGAL (key word class) immigrants - not migrant workers - not undocumented workers - but ILLEGAL immigrants from coming into our country and enjoying the freedoms and rights that we pay for daily.

I say build the wall, patrol it with aerial drones and ship every single person who crosses the border illegally back to the country they crossed from, whether that be Canada or Mexico. Put the onus of protecting the mutual borders on both our neighbors and start protecting our borders.

Eva Longoria

Anal Lube?

Reprise: Britney Spears - Role Model For The Youth of America

I rarely blog about my own blog, but here we go. The number one generator of traffic to this site has been the following picture you see here.
Now, you and I (normal, nose-breathing Americans) look at this photo, perhaps scratch our heads for a second, recognize that it's a photoshop, chuckle, and move on.

However, the continent of Europe and the State of California are very much satire-/humor-impaired. Here is a link to the comments I've received from some of these mouth-breathing inbred mongrels.

Apparently, some popular site in Europe has linked directly to this image on the Tattler, and every time Britney farts, we get a thousand hits. While I'd like to thank all the perverts around the world for visiting our blog every time we mention Britney Spears (or any other female for that matter), I'd also like to thank them to keep their mouths shut. If you want to defend Britney, go do it on your own blog, unless you love being the subject of derision and ridicule (which is kinda fun, in a mean way). If you look at this picture, then make a comment about how horrible we are, don't expect to be greeted with hugs and kisses.

It's a joke. Chuckle, then move on.

Ex-D.C. Mayor Barry Unharmed in Robbery - Yahoo! News

Ah, the sweet, sweet irony of this event. It took me a few minutes to stop laughing over this one.

...he gave the youths a couple of dollars for helping him with his groceries and they left. They returned, however, and pointed a gun at his head and took his wallet, which contained cash and credit cards...

Wait - aren't handguns illegal in D.C.?

Large wildfires singe North Texas

It smells like wildfires outside, and now inside the house. Check out this article - there's so much smoke, it's showing up on radar.

Don't toss that cigarette out the window, please.

Santa was good to me this year...

Yes, I finally took the plunge and bought myself a brand-spankin' new Dillon XL650 to load ammo for my extremely picky (but sweet) SV .40 limited gun. Brad was nice enough to drop it off for me last week (4 large boxes worth of goodies), since there's no way all that would have fit in my car. Having only reloaded on PD's press 3-4 times under strict supervision, I was more than a little intimidated by all the stuff. I finally got the courage to open all the boxes, drag everything out and start reading the manuals.

First thing I was lacking (besides a penis) was an overhead light in the garage. After a few conversations with the boys, I was off to Lowe's to buy a light to hang. One of the suggestions was to be sure to hang it from a stud (hehe), so after gathering the light, bulbs and hook-thingies I headed for the tools and picked out a combo stud-finder and laser level (sweet, I can use that to hang pictures too!). Now comes the hard part - figuring out how the gadget works (another manual, just super), putting my stepstool up on the desk in the garage, oops - running back to the store to get a *&%$ battery, measuring where the hooks should be and trying not to fall and break my neck. Painstakingly I drive the hooks through the sheetrock into the stud (later I realized that the hooks were waaay too short to go through the sheetrock and into the stud - good thing the light doesn't weigh very much - whatever). And I had light!

Next thing was to figure out what other tools I needed to put the press together (besides a penis). Off I go to Sears (my daddy always said buy Craftsman tools) to buy a 9-piece wrench set (~$25, not bad), then it was back home to the manuals and figuring out where and how to mount this baby. About an hour of measuring and marking later, I was ready to drill holes. Needed the stepstool again because I'm too short to make sure I'm drilling straight down - at least I'm closer to the ground this time. Voila! I have 4 holes ready to go - I center up the strong mount bracket holes over the 4 holes and - crap - one is off, and needs to be drilled out some more. Eh, 3 out of 4 isn't bad for a girl. A little while later, I had my XL650 firmly mounted to the bench - yay! Somewhere in there Catfish happens to call - that's good, since I need to ask where the washer goes in the nut/bolt/washer configuration. Shut up, I'm a girl and the picture in the %$#*ing manual didn't help. After a few days and many, many phone calls to my shooting husbands later, I finally have everything together - just need to mount the dies in the toolhead (yeah, I know what I'm talking about now!), adjust everything and I'll be cranking out the advertised 1000 rounds per hour. Crap, my nice little wrench set doesn't include a 1" - back to Sears, and yep it's the same clerk that called me "sir" when I bought the wrench set - little cretin. This one wrench is $18, but I rationalize that it's big enough to double as a weapon and that makes me feel better. Whatever, I have a press to finish putting together!

A few more hours later, my reloading bench looks spectacular! I still need to adjust everything (powder, seating die, crimp, etc.) but I am well on my way to cranking out some powder-puff .40! Ooo, what's that sensation in my pants...look, it's my virtual penis getting a chubby!

Pack of Angry Chihuahuas Attack Officer

Are there any other kind of Chihuahuas? The humanity:

A pack of angry Chihuahuas attacked a police officer who was escorting a teenager home following a traffic stop, authorities said. The officer suffered minor injuries including bites to his ankle on Thursday when the five Chihuahuas escaped the 17-year-old boy's home and rushed the officer in the doorway, said Fremont detective Bill Veteran.

Luckily, no shots were fired.

Meanwhile, in another part of Fremont:

Two hours earlier, a homeowner in Niles reported that an intruder broke into her home and added pornography to her computer.

The woman said she woke up and was startled to see a stranger typing away on her computer. The intruder fled, but left behind an altered screen saver that featured images of "erotic Indian art," Veteran said.

Those Fremont police are some brave people.

Top Ten Worst Americans

I saw this meme on several blogs (hat-tip to Atlas Shrugs). Seems appropriate, given that the New Year is when we look back and decide what sucks and what rules. Anyhoo - who are your Top 10 Worst Americans? Worthy entries will be edited from the comments into this entry.

After I get back from Kalifornia tomorrow night, that is.

A couple of ground rules. They must be American citizens, born or naturalized. They must have performed some function, duty, crime, or act that distinguishes them from the pack (like Ted Kennedy). Along with the name of the person(s), please include why they (in your humble opinion) deserve inclusion in this hall of dishonor.

I'll start off.

How about Senators Sarbanes and Oxley, for their "contribution" to American industry? Mark my words - history books will point to the Sarbanes-Oxley Act of 2002 as one of the primary reasons for the ultimate failure of many publicly-held companies. You think the Income Tax code is ridiculous? Try maintaining SarbOx compliance in today's modern world.

Your turn

From Outlaw 13:

I would say Ms. Fonda made her mark because she was the first (if I'm wrong please correct me) high profile/celebrity American citizen to go to a nation we were at war with and actively support that nation, undermine the morale of troops, and participate in the propaganda campaigns of those who wish this country ill, and virtually suffer no ill effects to her career (much less go to jail), and she continues those actions to this day. Because her actions went unpunished, future Hanoi Janes out there, who aren't rising to the same traitorous level as her get away with it...she's one of the worst because she was the first.

Maine Ocean Floor Has Mud-Trapped Gas

Yeah, who doesn't?

Next time you're on the seashore, pick up a shell and see if you can hear the ocean poot.

Merry Christmas

On behalf of everyone here at the Texican Tattler, I'd like to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas.

God bless us, every one.

Boy Scout Gets Knife Lodged In Brain

New t-shirt: "I got stabbed in the skull by my Scout leader, and all I got was this crappy haircut."

Family photo albums around the world are SO jealous.

Simon Sez Santa

Go crazy. Make sure you tell Santa to have a beer, and a cigar.

Racism alive and well

It saddens me to see racism alive and doing well. Here's a couple of recent stories highlighting one of our national tradgedies.

Both Council members sited in the DMN story are black. I'd be willing to bet a jillion dollars that niether will be even remotely punished for their violation of the LAW. You can also bet that if they are prosecuted, it won't be because they're guilty, it'll be because they're black. Unfortunately, it's about all you can expect from Dallas politics anymore.

Council member clears outstanding liens
Dallas City Council member Maxine Thornton-Reese on Thursday paid more than $1,000 to clear up outstanding liens that should have made her ineligible for re-election in 2005. Also Online11/17/05: Liens should have made 2 council members ineligible The payment came the day after news reports about the liens, which resulted from code violations at South Dallas properties owned by Dr. Thornton-Reese and Council member Leo Chaney. Mr. Chaney, whose violations dated back to 1995, paid his fines early this month. "I went looking for it after people said it," Dr. Thornton-Reese said Thursday. "I've paid up the lien. That's all I have to say." Under the City Charter, council candidates are not eligible to take office if they owe the city money for taxes or other liabilities. Mr. Chaney and Dr. Thornton-Reese have both said they were unaware they had outstanding liens at the time of their re-election in May, and that the city made no effort to notify them. City records indicate notices about the fines were sent to both council members. City Manager Mary Suhm and City Secretary Shirley Acy said the liens did not surface during routine eligibility checks, the result of database complications. Until he paid this month, Mr. Chaney owed the city $515.15 for mowing, cleaning and interest. Dr. Thornton-Reese owed $1,063.84 for three separate clean-ups of her property in 2004. If Mr. Chaney or Dr. Thornton-Reese's campaign opponents had learned of the liens within 30 days of May's election, they could have filed an election challenge. But City Attorney Tom Perkins said the only recourse now is for the Texas attorney general or the Dallas County district attorney to initiate a "quo warranto" proceeding to remove a council member who they believe is unlawfully holding an office.
E-mail eramshaw@dallasnews.com

The next story is about a hate crime that will never be prosecuted. In this case, two black guys happened to rob, beat, and then drag a white guy behind his own truck. You can bet a jillion dollars that if the colors were shifted, this would be all over the news.

Sad, really, that we haven't reached the point in our society where you can call a scumbag a scumbag without regard to what color he is.

Sounding off on snow sculpture

Follow-up on the snow weiner pic. You might be surprised to find out that some readers were not happy:

"May God damn this newspaper for running the photo of the snow penis online. I am no prude, but this display was truly pathetic and you should be ashamed of yourselves. Is this why you became journalists?"

Seems a bit harsh for a picture of a penis-cicle.

Oklahoma Woman Has 14-Pound, 3-Ounce Baby

Let's equate this feat with something most of us can relate to: a bowling ball weighs 16 pounds. Caesarean section, indeed.

A hospital spokeswoman said the baby already wears clothes made for children six to nine months old.

It's a girl.

Austrian mayor tries to woo Schwarzenegger

Now this is funny: Arnold's hometown says they're mad because he let Tookie get immunized from the human race, and threatens to change the name of the soccer stadium.

Arnold tells them to suck it.

Now his hometown of Graz says:

"I hope that very soon we'll hear you say, 'I'll be back,'" Nagl told the actor-turned-politician, one of Austria's most famous sons.

If they were in prison, Nagl would be Ahnold's you-know-what.

200,000 Hits

As it stands, we may hit this milestone tonight or tomorrow. I'll be watching the logs, and announce who the (most likely anonymous) 200,000th visitor is.

We gots lotsa readers. Thanks, folks.

TWA Hijacker Released From German Prison

From NewsMax.com

BEIRUT, Lebanon -- A Lebanese man serving a life sentence inGermany for the 1985 hijacking of a TWA jetliner and killing of a U.S. Navy diver has returned to Lebanon after being paroled in Germany, security and guerrilla officials said Tuesday.
Mohammed Ali Hamadi arrived in Beirut four days ago on a commercial flight from Germany, a Lebanese security official and a Hezbollah guerrilla group said. The U.S. Embassy in Beirut refused to comment on Hamadi's release or whether the United States will pursue his arrest. The slain diver's brother called the parole "absolutely disturbing."

I don't really expect much from Germany, but is it too much to ask for them to keep a terrorist who hijacked an airplane, killed a decorated Navy SEAL, and who was convicted of these acts and given a life sentence, TO KEEP HIS SORRY ASS IN PRISON?
I can only hope he will be picked up and brought back here where he can be given a first class trial followed by a first class execution, or that he dies a violent death at the hands of some of our operatives.

Texas utility to provide Internet over power lines

At first glance, this looks really cool - access the Internets through your electrical socket. Look closer, though:

Once completed, the grid will let TXU check meter consumption remotely and pinpoint problems before they become major blackouts.

TXU spokesman Chris Schein said Internet access was secondary to the smart grid capabilities.

Say what? I'm not too sure I want TXU poking around inside my business.

Think I'll stick with my fiber optic networking, thanks very much.

AHH, THE SMELL!

I wasn't clever enough to come up with a caption, so.........

Caption Contest!

No tangible prize, just the admiration of your fellow blogsters, and the sheer joy of skewering our favorite leftard.

For example:

Cindy describes her first road trip in the car with Pimp Daddy.

Jack Anderson has Died

Who's Jack Anderson, you say? You gun nuts should remember him well. He's the "journalist" who insisted that the "plastic" Glock handgun was a weapon of terror. Here's a piece by old Jack his ownself:

While producing a TV documentary on terrorism that year, I picked up disturbing evidence of how easy it would be to smuggle a weapon into the U.S. Capitol. I wanted to prove, on camera, that it could be done, so I borrowed Dale's plastic gun. Then I made an appointment to meet Senator Bob Dole in his office in the Capitol and talk to him on camera about security.

I took the gun apart, put the plastic pieces in my briefcase, and carried three bullets in my coat pocket. Then, with the camera crew taping me, I sailed through the Capitol metal detector and into the men's room where I reassembled the Glock. In Dole's office, as he was telling me how secure the building was, I produced the gun and handed him the bullets. He smiled sportingly, but his face was ashen.

This piece alone points out to anyone with ANY knowledge of Glocks that Jack Anderson was nothing more than a bald-faced liar, who twisted and distorted information to suit his agenda. This single lie did more to help gun control than virtually any other story in the last 30 years.

I guess I'll have to lump myself with Richard Nixon, who had Anderson on his famous "enemies" list.

Yet look at the glowing obituary from Reuters:

Anderson is considered one of the major figures in modern investigative journalism, fearless in pursuit of a story. He won his Pulitzer for reporting on secret American policy decision-making that implied the United States leaned toward Pakistan in its 1971 war with India.

I'll say this for Jack: he certainly set the benchmark for modern mainstream media. He taught them that if you say something's true in the newpapers, then it must be true, the facts be damned.