My Suicide

As the regular readers of this blog know, I took the plunge over the holidays and bought all the requisite equipment to start loading my own ammunition (read my saga). I've made about 500 rounds so far, and all is well - I'll reach ROI on this baby in no time. But I digress...

I live in an adorable little apartment - it's a 2-story, with my own 1-car garage downstairs and the living quarters upstairs. So this morning I go downstairs and load up about 150 rounds of ammo, then I throw some cases in the tumbler for cleaning while I come back upstairs to case gauge my picture-perfect rounds. Then it's back downstairs, where I decide to use the bullet-puller to dismantle a few not so perfect rounds. It's the kinetic kind, where you put the round in the thingy then pound it on the floor to dislodge the bullet and recover the components. Over all the noise of the tumbler I hear pounding (other than my own) - sounds like it's my front door, so I go out to the front entryway and look through the peephole (safety first!) - I see nothing. Then I hear my garage door going up - WTF? I go out the front door and come face to face with my new neighbor - an elderly woman who has a horrified look on her face. I look in my garage, and the leasing lady is in there opening my car door. I'm like "Hellooo, can I help you?", and she's got that same horrified I've-just-seen-a-ghost look that my neighbor was sporting.

Turns out that my new neighbor thought that I was trying to kill myself by running my car inside the garage, and that I had changed my mind and was banging on the wall for help. At least she just called the leasing office and not the police. They were both so shocked to find me alive and well that neither one ever asked me what the hell I was doing in there, or what all the strange equipment was for. I'm still expecting the police to come by and check out my "meth lab". Oh yeah - not once did they ring my doorbell or try to call me on the phone.

As I'm writing this, I'm hearing a strange arrhythmic thumping noise coming from one of the other apartments. Ohmygosh, someone has taken the entire family next door hostage! They're being systematically dismembered by a band of axe-wielding psychopaths! Call someone quick!! Or maybe it's just tennis shoes in a dryer. Nah....

P.S. JR gets credit for the title of this post - thanks!